First kiss alternatives for those who hate PDA

Guest post by LuLu
hi five
I'm a shy person, I've always been. I haven't been engaged for very long, but one thing that has been picking at my brain, any time I try to do any planning, is how to do the “you may now kiss each other” moment.

I love my partner and would really like to show it, but any time I think about kissing (or doing really any public displays of affection) I get sick to my stomach.

Do you think it's something I can cut out of the ceremony? Or have any tips on maybe making it easier?

As with anything in our lovely little circle of weirdos: You can add and/or remove any wedding traditions to make your ceremony feel more “you.” So my answer is yes to both questions. You can totally cut it from your ceremony, but if you feel like you want to replace it with something, here are some options…

You may now high-five each other

high five

We love us a good wedding high five. It's cute and it's celebratory! Want to go a little weirder than a high-five? Do what Shelley and Eric did…

You may now hand fart the bride

Photo by Hot Mess Photography
Photo by Hot Mess Photography

Since we are comedy writers, everything was an attempt at funny! “You may now hand fart the bride” was a great line, since Eric and I have a party trick we do sometimes where we make fart sounds while holding each other's hands. Immature, yes, but also fun!

You may now update your marital status on Facebook

Minister updating facebook.

Take a minute to mutually make your marriage “Facebook official” after your officiant announces your union. Maybe even do what Meg and Zach did, and have your officiant take the photo to go with the announcement.

You may now cheers each other


While Kendra and Tom “cheers-ed each other at each point in the ceremony,” you could have your toasting glasses on hand for a special first cheers at the end of the ceremony. Or maybe you could do a first shot together as a married couple?

Anyone else have any first kiss alternative ideas for people who hate PDA?

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Comments on First kiss alternatives for those who hate PDA

  1. My partner and I had a long conversation about this for our chuppah and decided we were not going to kiss at the end (there is no “declaration of married” at the end of a Jewish ceremony anyway) because he doesn’t like PDA. Then, in the moment, he leaned over and kissed me. Caught me totally off guard!! We ran out of the room, holding hands, and into Yichud (where we kissed more, and ate!!). We weren’t going to replace it with anything. Usually Jewish ceremonies end with the broken glass and a “mazel tov”.

  2. We high fived after we kissed. We kind of dared each other, and weren’t sure we were going to do it. And we forgot to tell the photographer the plan, so she didn’t get a shot of it. So be sure to give your photographer a heads up first. We recreated it afterwards, but it wasn’t quite the same.

  3. I really, really like the idea of the “first shot” – even more when I imagine they’re jello shots.

  4. I totally thought the first picture was of them doing the “elbow sex” move from Rocky Horror Picture Show. I can’t be the only one who would be so stoked to see that at a wedding!!!

  5. I have two wonderful friends who spontaneously high-fived each other at the wedding rehearsal instead of kissing. The officiant, who was clearly a bit overwhelmed by all the off-beat ceremony details (though very respectful of them) asked: “Are you going to do that during the ceremony?” After a mischievous exchange of looks, the answer was, “Yes! Yes, we are.” They kissed and then high-fived before triumphantly processing out. I have a photo of the wedding high-five on my fridge and I love it.

  6. My cousin put her hand up to their faces to hide the kiss and it was really cute.

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