The Offbeat Couple: Murphy, Content Editor & Deagle, Quality Assurance Technician
Date and location of wedding: Conrad Cauldwell House Museum, Louisville, KY — October 25, 2013
Our offbeat wedding at a glance: Our wedding was a decorated with a sort of Tim Burton monochromatic theme — very little décor. We used black and white striped fabric for the arch, tall black candelabras, black and white sand for the sand ceremony, and the venue itself was black and white. We had no flowers because we just considered them too expensive and unnecessary for us. The wedding itself cost less than $8,000, thanks to having no flowers, a small ceremony venue, few decorations, and a cheap non-traditional dress!
There were times I wished we'd done a tiny bit more for the décor, but I'm over it now. Deagle wore a suit with a crimson vest, and I wore a black pin-up dress with opera-length gloves, a black top-hat, and black pumps. My mom fashioned a long, black, sheer fabric as a last minute train, which looked even better than she originally described. The reception was video game-themed, covered in pictures from our favorite games: lots of Zelda, Half-Life 2, Team Fortress 2, and Mario references.
Tell us about the ceremony:
The ceremony featured ambient music from a bunch of video games as well. Our moms went down the aisle to a gorgeous cover of the Game of Thrones opening theme, and I danced down the aisle with my dad to Ella Fitzgerald's version of “Puttin' on the Ritz.”
Our biggest challenge:
Deciding on who to invite was a big one, as was trying to convince immediate family (namely mom and dad) that there was NO WAY we were going to do the traditional white wedding shindig. I had to explain a number of times that Deagle and I are very non-traditional, and didn't want elements that didn't represent us.
As for inviting folks, my biggest regret was that I did not, in the end, invite several of my oldest friends to the wedding. There had been some drama that we hadn't gotten passed. Every day I tell myself that I should have invited them, and the anxiety aftershock still hits me extremely hard to this day.
My favorite moment:
My mom, dad, and sister all made speeches that emphasized the love Deagle and I share. It was nice to see my dad get in front of the crowd and tell the public, in his own no-nonsense way, how important it is to find someone worth your time. My favorite moment of all was the moment the planner (my stepmom's best friend/traditionalist) found out that we decided on using rings after all (we were originally against the expense). When my husband showed her the rings, namely a titanium men's ring and a black Batman one, she frowned and asked which one was mine. When my husband said the Batman one was mine, she huffed in the most dramatic way and marched off. As Deagle puts it, “little does she know that my brothers and I have had years of practice irritating tiny, blonde women.”
What was the most important lesson you learned from your wedding?
Plenty of things. When free alcohol is provided, stop for a minute, and enjoy a glass of wine (or two). It's okay to buck tradition, because tradition is not for everyone. When your parents are paying for a good chunk of the wedding, it is important to give them a least a little say, as long as it respectfully coincides with the overall theme. What I mean by that is that if your dad would go to his grave miserable without walking you down the aisle, you might want to give in and let him do it.
And most importantly: when you make your guest list, go over it with a fine-toothed comb. And then go over it three more times. If you have people that you know would put aside differences to attend your special event, you should definitely invite them, or you risk crying half-way into the honeymoon about your stupid mistakes.
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