I'm one of those people who has ALL THE IDEAS and wants to use ALL THE IDEAS. I've planned half-a-dozen different weddings in my mind. The December planetarium wedding. The crisp summer navy-white-orange wedding. The autumnal books and bikes wedding. The travel-themed wedding. It's a little ridiculous.
The problem with that is, I'm always worried that there's a better idea out there. As we all know, Pinterest is a blessing and a curse — and in this case, it's too much. The dresses! The centerpieces! The colour schemes! The hairstyles! I was so concerned that I'd keep changing my mind on things and either never make decisions, or lose a lot of money chasing different dreams. So I solved that issue. And the solution is simple:
Put on the blinders. Even better, put some money down.
Here's what I mean…
I bought my dress online way before we were even engaged (but that's another story). Since then, I've continued to watch all the TLC bridal shows, but I have not gone onto a single bridal-gown site. Is there a better dress out there somewhere? I'm sure there is. But I have one, and I can't afford another, and it could only do harm to indulge in things I can't have.
Another example? Centerpieces. I agonized over centerpieces oh so much. More than anything, it drove me crazy because I knew the final centerpiece wasn't important, it's just one detail, but there were so many awesome ones out there that I wanted them all, while staying in a smallish budget. Finally, I had a stern talk with myself, picked two that I liked, got my future husband's and maid of honor's opinions, and immediately bought several components of the one we agreed on. There. I was committed. No other options.
For me, putting on the blinders is the best way to stay sane, make decisions, and stick to them. Once I've made a choice, I delete the other options on my Pinterest boards and simply refuse to seek out more. If I see something tempting (like in a featured wedding on Offbeat Bride), I say out loud, “That's beautiful, but it's not for me.” Putting down money to back up the decision helps, too. It's a tangible confirmation of a decision and added pain if I change my mind.
At some point, you have to stop waffling and simply make a decision. There's so much outside influence beating down on brides, between social media, opinionated family and friends, and the ever-present Wedding Industrial Complex, that it's virtually impossible to please everyone with any given decision.
So it's time to stand firm, please yourself, and stick to your guns. Since I took up that position, planning has gone much more smoothly. I've settled on a date, a venue, a caterer, a dress, bridal party, centerpieces, and a guestbook in short order, with slightly over a year to go. Not too shabby.
What are your coping methods? How do you make decisions and avoid buyer's regret or other pressure from outside influences?