When I saw this wedding in the OBB Flickr Pool, I was like “OMG! I must know everything about this amazing red haired, punk rock, mohawk wedding! EVERYTHING!” And it was WAY awesomer than I thought — there is a body modification ceremony, co-mohawks, the Looney Tunes theme song, and a DIY cake. As Ariel said recently, while all of us love all kinds of Offbeat weddings, we, also, all have our own fantastic brand of Offbeat. This is mine, y'all! Enjoy! – Becca


The offbeat bride: Sonja

Her offbeat partner: Wade, senior developer for Wolfgans Vault

Location & date of wedding: Spoontonics Lounge, Walnut Creek, CA — November 15, 2008

What made our wedding offbeat: I threw out tradition and invited creativity and sentimentality. No stuffiness, just pure joy, celebrating the miracle of our love.

ForeverThe ceremony was performed by a dear friend and written about the most romantic moment in our courtship.

The cutting of the cake included a battle axe, the top layer smashed in my face and a full fledged cake fight! We made a disaster of the floor and our faces. It was a blast!

We set out memorial candles with name cards and a Book Of The Dead for all our loved ones who have passed. That way they had a place reserved and an open invitation to join us on our special day.4109448983 23bb33fa8c m alternative wedding ideas from Offbeat Wed (formerly Offbeat Bride)

Guests were encouraged to dress however they felt, so we had zombies to represent our love of horror. We had parents and uncles drinking with goth chics, nerds, 1980's divas, side show freaks, a famous horror spokeswomen, rockabilliys, bikers, and corseted sex-pots!


aisleTell us about the ceremony: The ceremony was written around body modification. Wade had me use a scalpel to carve MY chest scars into HIS chest. He said that they are the reason I am still alive and was able to meet and fall in love with him. Therefore, he wanted to have a permanent reminder of just how special our love is. (So romantic!) The story was no surprise to those that knew us and tears were a plenty.

As we were pronounced husband and wife, the bar became an uproar. We told everyone to bring a camera since we has no photographer, but we had no way of foreseeing the onslaught of flashes to come!

Our exit song was the theme to Looney Toons, which brought plenty of laughter.

CakeOur biggest challenge: I baked my own cake, and there was an error with the fondant the morning of the wedding. My heart started the anxiety train, but our best man calmed me down and got me focused again. With a little help, we were able to fix it well enough for me to be happy with it.

My favorite moment: Since we'd only known each other two and a half months, some thought it was a bit soon to marry. But we each knew the moment we met, that this was it. We convinced the house of that with our vows. They were the absolute most wonderful moment for me. We each wrote our own and the amount of love he professed almost dropped me to my knees. He's such an eloquent writer — there wasn't a dry eye in the house! This is the kind of love you see in the movies! [Intern's note: This wedding happend in 2008. They've been married for two years now! Take that, doubters.]


My funniest moment: The cake fight was by far the funniest moment of the reception! I had cake up my nose; he had it in his ears! It was amazing. And when we got the pictures back, seeing the looks on the guests faces was priceless!

OfficialWas there anything you were sure was going to be a total disaster that unexpectedly turned out great? When I went to get ready for the reception, I realized I forgot my blow dryer! Our thing was: hair down during ceremony, hair up for reception. Well, my mohawk won't go up without a blow dryer because it's soooo long. Luckily a friend of mine helped me with the hairspray to get a decent look. Whew! And in the photos, it turned out looking better than I thought!

My advice for offbeat brides: Let the wedding take a life of its own. Forget perfection and flow with the unexpected! Things WILL happen that you can't foresee, try to enjoy the change! We were supposed to have a first dance , but it turned into a disco dance floor so, we went with it. Your wedding is supposed to be a CELEBRATION of your love, NOT a rigid series of moments without meaning. Drop the “dream” wedding, and grab the Loving Celebration instead!Complimentary Barf Bag

What was the most important lesson you learned from your wedding? I learned that weddings or even events of any kind, can and WILL take on a life of their own. They ebb and flow, and your best bet is just to go with it. You'll find fun and joy if you stay relaxed and let errors happen. Just laugh!!!

Care to share a few vendor/shopping links?
The whole wedding cost about $1200!

  • TablesetOutfits: All our outfits were upcycled from thrift store finds, except my blouse by Bebe. My dress was modeled after my great grandmother's who married in 1904. The veil, crown and bouquet were hers! I took her style and made it mine with a touch of punk and a dab of industrial.
  • Decorations: Since we were marrying on the heels of Halloween, we took advantage of all the sales and decorated in a spooky style on a dime.
  • Our favors were complimentary barf bags that we made. Everyone said we were so cute it made them sick, so there you have it! Inside we placed a nut and bolt to represent the fact that I've always been nuts, and I finally found my bolt.
  • Altar painting: Our friend Jen Ann Tonic spun her artistic web and created our altar piece; the painting of us kissing.

So basically, we took things we had around, hit thrift stores, dollar stores, used some scrapbook supplies I already had and a printer. This, with a little imagination, can make for a great wedding!”


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Comments on Sonja & Wade’s original, retro, steamPUNK DIY wedding

  1. “Your wedding is supposed to be a CELEBRATION
    of your love, NOT a rigid series of moments without meaning. Drop the “dream” wedding, and grab the Loving Celebration instead!”

    This is exactly what I needed to hear. Thank you ๐Ÿ˜€


    • It’s SO VERY TRUE! Seems like brides often loose sight of the true meaning of the wedding. It’s not about how white the linens are! It’s about love. So get out there and CELEBRATE it!

      Good luck, dear!

  2. One of the coolest, most badass weddings I’ve seen on here. I wish I knew you guys, and could hang out with y’all.

  3. My brain is still processing all the badassness that I just saw here, but I love how absolutely true to yourselves the entire day seemed to be. And that you had older relatives partying with all your friends, and everyone had a good time. Congrats on two years, and many more to come!

  4. They knew each other 2.5 months before they *married,* or before they goy *engaged?* I’m just asking because if it’s the former, I’m super-impressed they got it all planned so quickly!

  5. Thank you all so much for the love. We had a wonderful time and are enjoying our 2nd anniversary week! And to clear up some questions, he asked me to marry him 2 weeks into knowing each other, so we took a month and a half to plan the wedding!

    • You are truly a rock star, if for this fact alone ๐Ÿ™‚ Amazing job on such a quick turnaround.

      And if I recall correctly, my grandmother knew my grandfather for only 2 months before they were married and they were together til his death parted them.

      My guy and I have been together for 3 years, but I firmly believe that once you know.. you know. I knew long before he asked, we just took a while to get around to it ๐Ÿ™‚

      May you have many many more happy anniversaries!

      • What a sweet story about your grandparents! Thank you for sharing that with me.

        And yeah, when you know, you know. Period. We knew the night we met.

        Happy marraife to you both as well!

  6. It was a great honor to be a part of this wedding, from seeing the creation of clothes and cake to dancing the night away with the COOLEST people on the planet. It was in fact amazing what they were able to do in such a short amount of time, but the theme, decor, music, and ceremony were all SPECTACULAR! It was the most fun wedding I’ve ever been to! Just shows you, where theres a will, theres a way! (having friends help too! PUT EM TO WORK!!) ๐Ÿ™‚

  7. Knowing this couple and being asked to attend their SPECTACULAR special day have been honors in our lives. This was TRULY a memorable day and they are just as amazing in person as conveyed here. Much love to SWADE from Chris & Stan!! ROCK ON YOU TOO!! XOXO

  8. I love it! Everything about this wedding is beautiful and I love the story behind it. I, too, live in California and seeing the budget on this wedding gives me hope.

    We have been struggling to save money and are trying to save at the least $3000. I bought a bunch of Halloween decorations and props on sale at my work a couple weeks ago to store away for our hopefully wedding October 29 2011.

    Again, very beautiful and gives me hope ๐Ÿ™‚

    • You have more than enough time for a wonderful wedding! IF you stay relaxed. Details are important but not dire. You won’t die if the white linen is a different white than the place setting. See? That’s what I did. I just let go and it was awesome!

  9. Wow. I wish you guys lived in Toronto, because you seem like the kind of people my fiance and I would hang out with. Everything about your wedding is completely balls out baddy-licious!

  10. So…I’m ashamed to admit that when I first read you only knew each other 2 1/2 months before getting married, my first inkling thought, before I could shut it down, was “wow, that isn’t very long”: yep, I was one of those doubters. But after shutting down my pre-conceived doubt, I am so amazed that you have finally proved to me the expression “when you know, you know”. You two definitely know, and you had an absolutely amazing celebration of your love to top it off. Everything was absolutely beautiful and genuine, and through the comments you seem so excited still about it. This is one of the most beautiful weddings I’ve seen in a long time. Brava! Thanks for challenging my misconceptions and giving me a beautiful, loving wedding to oggle at on top of that.

  11. Love, love, love everything. Makes me wish I knew about yours when I did our red and black thing in 2006. This wedding is truly one of the best I’ve ever seen and damn you look beautiful.

    Sid ๐Ÿ™‚

  12. It looked like a blast!
    My man and I also knew we wanted to get married right away but time just flew by and we wound up getting married 2 1/2 years later.
    Our wedding took 5 weeks to plan from start to finish.
    We were just like, let’s do this!
    We spent very little and got married in our driveway.
    We are on this site too, under Jennifer and Bruce’s Vintage Jedi Driveway Wedding.
    Kudos to you guy!
    You are a great-looking fun couple and congrats for just doing it!!

    • You looked so retro & beautiful! Loved it. It had class and comfort and fun. All timeless elements for an offbeat wedding!! Congrats!

  13. To my dear friends Sonja and Wade, I love you two so much! In your third year of marriage, you have survived adversity that would make lesser couples run for the hills. I salute your abiding love and faith in each other. I’m so honored to call you my friends.


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