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Hello offbeat believers! Last week we featured a comic book wedding that had it all: Pizza! Spiderman! Rickrolling down the aisle! And… a unity snack mix ceremony!? This geeky genius of a couple came up with the idea of a wedding snack mix – in front of friends and family, they carefully combined all their fave munchables in a bowl to symbolize their love.
Now it's time for the rest of the story – here are their complete superhero wedding vows, full of superheroes, scifi, and nerd culture refs:
Officiant:
As the character Chidi from the The Good Place, a TV show about the afterlife once said: “If soulmates do exist, they’re not found. They’re made. People meet, they get a good feeling, and then they get to work building a relationship.”With that in mind I ask you,
Do you Dan take Molly as your beloved Wife?
Will you protect her from the threat of the Dark Side and from being frozen in carbonite throughout the far reaches of the galaxy?
Will you protect her from the threat of evil doers or Super Villains?
Will you love her more than Michelangelo loves pizza?Will you be her lookout Goose, keeping her safe, sheltered, and protected?
Will you love, help and encourage Molly in all that you say and do?
Will you listen to her thoughts and care for her well-being?
Will you share with her your laughter and your tears?
Do you promise to keep Molly in your heart, for always and always as her devoted husband?Dan: I do.
Officiant:
Do you Molly take Dan as your beloved Husband?
Will you love him like Mary Jane Watson Loves Peter Parker?
Will you be there for him in this universe and every multiverse?
Will you listen to his thoughts, even if one just pops in there, like the form of the destructor being a 50 foot stay-puft marshmallow man?
Will your love uh, find a way? Until you both go extinct?
Will you help and encourage Dan in all that you say and do?
Will you care deeply for his well-being?
Will you share with him your laughter and your tears?
Do you give your heart to him as his devoted wife now and forever?Molly: I do.
Officiant:
Every marriage ceremony includes an aspect of unity. This ceremony is designed to be the symbolic unification of the couple in front of their beloved community.Some use two candles to ignite a larger candle, some wrap hands together with cloth, some gather their community and receive blessings. Molly and Dan are going to be making a delicious snack mix to signify their joining together today as one. These Doritos, Cheetos and other snacks are great on their own, but mixed together, they create something new and distinctly delicious.
Now comes one of the most important parts of any relationship: The Work. Remember to take the time to enjoy building a life together and take pride in the love that you pour into your relationship. At this time we'd like ask Dan and Molly to enjoy the first taste of their snack mix… They also invite the all of our friends and family to enjoy this delicious mix as another way of celebrating their love.
We will now exchange wedding rings as a symbol of love without end. As long as your love is complete and continuous – as rounded and continuous as the rings you are about to exchange – your future together will be assured. May these rings always reflect the light of your love throughout the years of your life together.
Dan and Molly, you have publicly declared your love and commitment to one another, and proclaimed your choice to marry before these witnesses by saying your Wedding Vows and further symbolized by the Exchanging of Rings.
Therefore, by the power vested in me, I pronounce that you are Husband and Wife! You may kiss the Bride!
Delicious! Looking for additional inspiration for your own team-up? Allow our full collection of superpowered comic book weddings and nerdy vows to give your epic day maximum POW!
About the Author: Offbeat Weditors
Working tirelessly to bring you stimulating content day after day, the Offbeat Wed editors will not sleep until you've gotten your offbeat fix.
