Just got engaged? Now wtf am I supposed to do?!

Just got engaged? Wondering how WTF you're supposed to do? Here’s where to start, offbeat style

So, you just got engaged… Congrats, besties! 🎉 Now what? Before you get sucked into a Pinterest spiral or start fielding 1,000 well-meaning but overwhelming questions, let’s take a second to vibe.

First up: Did you know November through February is officially “Engagement Season” in the mainstream wedding world? It’s like cuffing season’s bougie cousin. Most proposals happen between Thanksgiving and Valentine’s Day. But here’s the deal: we’re not about mainstream, and we’re definitely not about stress. This moment is about you and your partner… not Aunt Karen’s opinions on table linens.

Chances are, your loved ones are already blowing up your phone with questions like:

• “When’s the wedding?!”
• “What’s the theme?”
• “Do you need help finding {random wedding thing you’ve never thought about}?”

They mean well, it’s their way of saying “I’m so happy for you!” But let’s be real: the pressure can feel a little overwhelming.

“Wait, do I need a theme? WTF is a wedding website even for? And why are people talking about STDs?!” (Spoiler: it means Save The Dates, lol.)

Breathe in, bestie… and exhale. Here’s the big secret: you don’t have to have all the answers right now.

Even if you’re planning a short engagement, you don’t need a fully fleshed-out Pinterest board in week one. Wedding planning is basically a series of tiny, manageable tasks that you can tackle one at a time. Baby steps, babe.

For now? Just enjoy the moment. Hold hands with your boo. Bask in the congratulations. The questions from your loved ones are really just excitement in disguise… with a question mark on the end. You’re not on a deadline to figure it all out.

When you’re ready to dip a toe into planning, here’s where to start:

1. Share the news (your way)

Whether you want to scream it from the rooftops or keep it chill, sharing your engagement is all about your vibe. Some couples tell their inner circle ASAP… others savor the secret before going public. Either way, start with your close people, the ones who’ll hype you up the hardest, and then decide when to make it IG official.

Pro Tip: Want to avoid drama? Let your fam and closest friends hear it from you first. That’s the move if you want to skip the awkward “I saw it on Facebook” convos amongst your older relatives who still use Facebook.

2. Pick a general timeline

“When’s the wedding?” is the top question you’ll get, so it’s worth thinking about a general idea. Do you have a specific date, season, or vibe in mind? Maybe you’re dreaming of a cozy winter wedding, a sunny summer bash, or a significant anniversary date.

Quick FYI: Wedding costs can vary depending on the season, day of the week, and venue. If you’re eyeing a specific spot, locking in the date early helps everything else fall into place… like vendor bookings and save-the-dates.

3. Grab Offbeat Wed’s Wedding Planning Spreadsheets + Bonus Checklist

Not to flex, but our spreadsheet pack is iconic. Freshly updated and gloriously inclusive, it’s tailored for nontraditional couples like you. We’ve been helping couples since 2007 (back when we were Offbeat Bride!), and these spreadsheets have been fan faves ever since.

Here’s some of what it covers:

• Guest list management
• Writing your ceremony script and vows
• Booking and paying vendors (photographers, caterers, DJs… you name it)
• Sending invites
• Finalizing your menu
• Reception planning
• Honeymoon prep
• Filing your marriage license
• Setting up your wedding website and registry
• Thank-you notes for gifts

(Bonus tip: There’s one unexpected thing we high-key recommend doing the night before your wedding. Trust us, it’s a vibe and yes that is a cheeky pun wink wink my eye!)

DOWNLOAD NOW

For now, though? Ditch the spreadsheets, grab your partner’s hand, and soak up the love. Your wedding planning journey starts when you’re ready… and we’ll be here to cheer you on every step of the way. You’ve got this!