You know how in the movies (and in real life sometimes) the emphasis is so heavy on the girl dressing up? When a girl gets ready for prom, she comes down the stairs and everyone oohs and ahhs? When she steps out of the dressing room, cinched into her bridal sample, people sigh and just have a hizzy over her? How the groom's heart skips a beat when he finally sees her walk down the aisle?
You ever notice how that doesn't happen for men?
The man never comes down the stairs to oohs and ahhs like that. They don't get the sighs or the sentimental moment. I don't read about a lot of brides oohing about their groom in his groomwear. People fix their ties and tell them they are handsome, with tight lips and stern expressions, not the soft dewey kind of moment that women are expected to have.
When I made the decision to make my poor Boy and his nephew wear white pants, we had to head to the store and bring the shirts and vests with us. I waited outside the room, bored, staring at the wall and then The Boy emerged from the dressing room in his crisp white dress shirt, chocolate brown vest and white pants. He looked so handsome, so fantastic, so very MINE that I was breathless.
He had his hands on his hips and he kept spinning in circles checking himself out in the mirror and commenting on how much he loved the way it all looked. And my mind spun in circles too — my insides got all gooey as I watched him, full of love, full of lust, and full of excitement. I ran up and I hugged him and kissed him and told him he was the most beautiful man I'd ever seen. He blushed and smiled and preened for the rest of the day.
All grooms should have their moment as well. Hug them and kiss them and tell them they are the handsomest men you've ever seen. Because they are. They are beautiful and flawed and sweet and frustrating and OURS.
I like it. I’ll make a point to tell my groom how beautiful and handsome he is today.
Beautiful…. 🙂
Dude, I try to do this every day. My fiance is a wildly vain Leo, and seeing the boost of happy he gets every time I tell him he’s gorgeous is endlessly entertaining. 🙂
hahaha, it’s amazing how much leos need compliments. it’s basically one of our food groups.
As a Taurean marrying a Leo, I really had NO concept of this – but yes, I have learned that Leos bloom when they are fawned over. (I mean, who doesn’t – but especially Leos, wow.)
I told my husband how handsome he looked all day. If wad the first thing I said to him when I got a chance to talk to him. Even the groomsmen too!!! No one should forget any of the main men that day!
Couldn’t agree more. 🙂 Very moved by this– my fiance is someone who is sort of saddened by the fact that men’s clothes and the male aesthetic for weddings and other things is so much more standard and secondary to women’s… he loves to dress up (he’s an actor) and i always try to honor that by making sure he feels appreciated. it’ll be doubly true on our wedding, cause we firmly believe it’s about ‘US,’ not about ME.
I don’t tell him he’s beautiful, but I do tell him he’s gorgeous and sexy and hot and mine all the time.
He will be stunning at the wedding. He’s having a gorgeous suit made at almost as much as my dress is costing.
I refer to my fiance as my Handsome Man at least once a day. He likes it 🙂
Me too! I always say, “How’s my Handsome Man today?” Always gets a smile. I can’t wait to see him dressed up on our wedding day–he wants to get s special, super-awesome suit, which I heartily encourage because I want him to feel special and super-awesome. He is going to look just as amazing as I am! 🙂 People better tell him so, or else I’ll say it for them: “Doesn’t my Handsome Man look amazing?”
I tell him that all the time!
Yes! I actually designed our wedding attire based around what colors look best on him because, as I put it “I’m gonna be looking at *you* all day” and I wanted him to look his best! And he looked so good 🙂
Good thing that real life is not like the movies!
I hear just as many ooos and Ahhhs for men as for women when they get all spiffed up.
We had lots of fun at the haberdashery with the salesmen when we went to pick up his suit. Lots of “oos” over the beautiful shirts and ties, and how great he looked in this color or that color.
Oh, my husband looked SO HOT at our wedding. I still get all hot and bothered for him when I see the photos. Everyone commented on it, too.
This made me chuckle. I think I am gonna feel the same way in 2 weeks! YAY us!
When my ex & I were shopping for his wedding suit, we ended up at a (now closed) high-end men’s clothing store in Chicago. The salesman treated my then-fiance like a total prince, pretty much ignoring me. It was so delightful to see him feel so doted on, and then to feel so handsome in his suit! (which he then was able to wear again and again for years – not at all like a wedding dress!)
THANK YOU for this.
Beautiful, beautiful post. I make a point of telling my fiance how gorgeous and sexy and attractive he is to me at every opportunity. And, every time, his eyes light up and he looks so happy. He had body dysmorphic disorder as a teen, and still struggles a bit with self-image…so it’s important to me to reassure him, and make him feel special and loved on every day we’re together. And, I know he’s going to look amazing on our wedding day. 😀
I go goo goo for my FH every day I get to see him. I think when you are head over heals in love with someone you can’t help but giving them the attention they deserve. Great Article!
We decided we wanted a more equal walk down the isle, so first his whole family will walk him down the isle, then my whole family is walking me, who says just the girl gets the huge entrance to the wedding?
We’re doing this exact thing at our wedding–I’ve never liked how the menfolk in a wedding sort of just slink in from a sketchy side entrance and stand there looking terse while the ladies get all the drama of a big entrance. My groom deserves a walk down the aisle so everyone can admire him too!
Right on time! We went to have him try on tuxes today and I was GIDDY the whole time! I told him repeatedly how great he looked! 7 whole days and he’s mine! All mine!!
Hear Hear! Men deserve to hear how awesome they look in the fancy pants. Mine confesses that he enjoys the nice clothes I help him pick out 🙂 I can’t wait to see him dressed up in a sexy tux!
hehe, my guy tends to highly dislike dressing up, but he still takes care in what he wears, even if it’s jeans and sneakers. He just got a suit for his best friends wedding, and dressed up in it for me – oh my word, he looked more gorgeous and stunning than normal! And he felt good in it as well – which of course added to the handsome factor!
Oh, mine does all the time. It can take some getting used to, especially for someone who grew up as the stereotypical “nerd”. We do appreciate it, even if we don’t always know how to show it.
Well said. This is so important to remember! My husband very much appreciated getting in on the attention and appreciation at our wedding. And he looked super hot.
I can’t wait to see you AND your groom looking gorgeous at your wedding this summer! <3
This is a great post! And I couldn’t agree more. My husband-to-be is all non chalant when I tell him he’s gorgeous or handsome, etc. but I know that inside he’s loving that attention. I think he looks so good that I decided to have him walk me down the aisle so everyone can feast on his beauty a little more than tradition dictates. 🙂 I wish these last two weeks would hurry up… I want to go down that aisle today!
When out with Handsome Husband & groomsmen trying on wedding suits, I was suprised to be moved to tears when he came out of the change room with his Wedding suit on.
I often see him looking great in suits for work, but there was something that hit me in a strikingly different way when he came out in *the* suit.
I fell in love with him all over again in that moment, and fell even harder again when I saw him on our wedding day. I make sure every day he is acknowledged for being Handsome Husband, and I know it makes a huge difference to him, and our relationship!
🙂
Maybe a few months late on this comment but I am so happy to be having my handsome groom to be, wearing an all white tux…In my faith tradition we wear all white in the actual ceremony (LDS mormon) and I wanted to pull that both of us wearing white out into the grounds. I am so happy for my groom to not be doing the traditional thing, and we are adding offbeat elements to our wedding.
He is going to be so Handsome and Beautiful and I don’t really like those comments for me because of the reasons stated above: Its ALWAYS about the woman and her looks and how gorgeous she is. It doesn’t feel substantial enough as a compliment to me. I love the rare occasions though when he just looks plain handsome and Beautiful and I tell him so. It usually comes when his hair is all a mess after he just woke up and we are skyping.
I feel it is about both of us, so why should the Bride be the only one in white? I love the suit I found at Man’s warehouse. I can’t be there when he goes and rents it. So its sort of like a surprise to me too, how he will look in that handsome suit, I am going to tell him I do not want a picture (and I will send that to his father too, so he can stop him from sending me one). I love to be surprised.
It shouldn’t all be about the Bride, that is my definite feeling, and we have both come to feel by doing certain things to downplay the whole its the Brides day only, that we can definitely feel comfortable.
I tell him everyday that he’s pretty, I love the smile he cracks every time I tell him 🙂
My guy didn’t want me to see his suit before the wedding ’cause he wanted to surprise me. I already had had to buy him his vest and tie, not only because he couldn’t find them here in Paris for his size but also to make sure it matched exactly the shade of bordeaux in my dress. But I didn’t know the rest and he was so handsome I couldn’t take my eyes off him through the whole ceremony… I barely noticed anything or anyone else.
You’re right: grooms don’t get so much atention, so it’s up to us brides (and who better?) to make sure they know how gorgeous they are, in case no one else has told them.
My husband wanted to wear the tux he already owned and maybe get it altered so it fit him better. He had always been to virtually identical weddings so wearing a tux was simply “what is done”. The tux would have been okay but it really wasn’t a tux that flattered his body shape. I convinced him to go with his brother in law to look at suits with the understanding that the tux was always an option. He got a fantastic suit for a great price and then I got him a tie that matched the blue of my dress since he didn’t want to see it before the wedding. The suit was from Top Man, which has fantastic suits for slim men (who usually have a tough time finding a suit cut for them and not simply taken in) and the tie from TJ Maxx. He got as many compliments on his suit as I did on my dress. Just as it should be.
My fiance has agreed to wear his dress blues for our wedding and I am so excited! He looks soooooooooo good in his uniforms (well, I think he looks good in anything, but the blues are special). I always try to make a point of telling him how handsome I think he is, even though he always just rolls his eyes and says, “whatever you say.” I definitely agree that it’s important to show our grooms some love 🙂
Great article. I tell my husband how handsome he is all the time. I made sure that when planning the wedding, he had a very real part in it and it was always our wedding and he was to wear something that was special too. He actually got two outfits, one was a costume from WOW for the ceremony and the other was his wedding suit for the rest of the night. I even made sure that he got that first look moment from the guests, he got to walk down the aisle ahead of me and then I got my moment to see him and he sees me. Far too much emphasis is put on just the bride. It’s not just the brides day, it’s the grooms day too. It’s not the brides wedding, it’s their wedding. I tell my husband how special and handsome he is all the time.