Gender affirming: I wore a tux for the first time, officiating my sister’s wedding

Guest post by Forrest Mortifee
gender affirming
All photos courtesy of Forrest Mortifee

When my sister asked me to officiate her wedding I felt honored and excited.

As a recording artist, I'm using to being in front of crowds, but acting as my sister's officiant, this would be the first time since my transition that my entire family would be seeing me in a tuxedo. Talk about a gender affirming opportunity!

Leading up to the wedding, I felt nervous, cautious, and dysphoric. It was so epic to try on a tux for the first time… I went to a place called The Tux Store in Vancouver BC, and when I first put on the tux, I felt this swirl of dysphoric and euphoric.

And then came the wedding day itself.

To actually put the tuxedo on, and catch that first glimpse of myself in a full-length window outside!? I was like, Holy shit that's a foine man right thurr…

Stepping out in front of everyone during the ceremony was surreal. There were so many extended family members, and friends of the fam seeing me like this for the first time. It was very affirming… I even introduced myself as my sister's brother at the beginning of the ceremony!

gender affirming

My cousin's wife said she didn't even recognize me, and asked my step-mom, “Who is that handsome man over there?” lol!

Getting to ordain the ceremony was just an epic privilege… I got to curate the vibe of one of the most important moments in my beloved sister's life! The guests were so hype, but also so teary-eyed. We shared good laughs and tender moments.

At the end of the wedding, my dad came up to me and said, “You absolutely rocked that ceremony — you are a King. An absolute King. A King and a Prince all wrapped up in one!”

That meant so much coming from my dad — hearing him call me a King made me feel SO seen.

forrest mortifee formerly clear mortifee alternative wedding ideas from Offbeat Wed (formerly Offbeat Bride)
Forrest dancing at his sister's reception. Photo courtesy of the author.

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