A non-possessive and nontraditional handfasting wedding ceremony script

 We showed you their celebration, now read their nontraditional handfasting ceremony script! After researching tons of handfasting ceremony scripts and pagan wedding ceremony scripts for their queer burlesque celebration, Mx. Pucks found that most of them were extremely gendered and swayed towards monogamy and one true love. So they decided to write their own non-possessive and nontraditional handfasting ceremony script.

They said:

Navigating the gendered language and some of the more outdated ideas of what commitment can look like has yet again highlighted how much the patriarchy is a pain in the ass. Acknowledging the love Pucks shares with other partners and the love Josh and they share for their friends and communities guided the creation of their ceremony script.

Mx. Pucks shared a snippet of their ceremony script at their celebration and we knew we had to read more! Behold, the non-gendered, poly-friendly handfasting ceremony script we all needed.

Mx. Pucks and Josh's nontraditional and non-possessive ceremony script

High Priestess Briq: Good evening and hey y’all!

We are gathered here to celebrate two humans that have touched us all…some of us in more ways than others. 

When these two wildly unique and creative individuals called upon me to be the High Priestess for their handfasting ceremony I knew that this day would be a reflection of not only their love for each other, but of the love they have for the communities, friends, partnerships, and families that they are a part of and have created separately and together. 

First, before we continue we wish to invite their ancestors into the space that wish to be here and bear witness to their binding. We would also like to invite those that have offerings for the altar to please approach now.

[The Queen's Guard or wedding party place the items on the altar.]

The only gendered language to be used for Pucks will be Queen. Many of you may already know that Josh’s last name is King. These two will be referred to as such through this ceremony.

This ceremony isn’t about ownership. This ceremony isn’t about monogamy. This ceremony isn’t about one true love.

Both this Queen and King have an understanding of love that goes beyond eros, pragma, and ludus. These two believe in a universal love which they share with us, their friends, family, and community. Today this Queen and King want to bind their hands in front of us, their friends, family, and lovers as a sign of commitment to each other. They have invited us to witness their agreement to each other under this September sky with the sun and moon looking on as well. 

I'll ask Rebecca to step forward to give us a reading.

Rebecca: “That while a partner can add sweet dimension to our lives, we, each of us, are responsible for our own fulfillment. Nobody else can provide it for us, and to believe otherwise is to delude ourselves dangerously and to program for eventual failure every relationship we enter.

Love is the ultimate outlaw. It just won't adhere to any rules. The most any of us can do is to sign on as its accomplice. Instead of vowing to honor and obey, maybe we should swear to aid and abet. That would mean that security is out of the question. The words ‘make' and ‘stay' become inappropriate. My love for you has no strings attached. I love you for free.”

-Tom Robbins' Still Life With Woodpecker

High Priestess Briq: King and the Queen will now share their vows with each other.

[The King and Queen give their vows.]

High Priestess Briq:

Queen told me they love the way that King loves and cares for Queen's son. 

King told me he loves how Queen's eyes are like the color of most darkest, most delicious root beer.

These two have chosen to exchange rings filled with roses, gold leaf, and cannabis. They have also chosen to share a pipe filled with their two favorite strains, like the two of them coming together, blending and becoming something even more special.

[On the altar there are two stash jars, each with their own strain of cannabis, a grinder, a lighter and a pipe. Josh and Pucks add their strain to the grinder and each take a turn grinding it. Josh packs it and they both took turns taking a hit.]

High Priestess Briq: This cord, braided in black and red will bind these two, together.

“Reaching out and taking someone's hand is the beginning of a journey. At other times, it is allowing another to take yours.” – Vera Nazarian, The Perpetual Calendar of Inspiration

“The hand can never execute anything higher than the heart can imagine.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

High Priestess Briq:

The King may kiss The Queen.