An illustrated story of one offbeat bride’s venue search and encounter with Cheese Madness

Guest post by Christy

Tribe member Christy recently offered her illustrated account of how she and her fiance decided on their wedding venue. You'll find that both cheese and unicorns are involved… so you know it has to be awesome.

All illustrations by Christy.
All illustrations by Christy.

The most excellent fiancé and I had a tasting at our venue in DUMBO last night, and it was so much better than I imagined. We kept asking them if it was a trap.

We were happily sampling wine and our first appetizer until we realized that the couple next to us was taking meticulous notes on everything. We had been operating on a grading system of “Awesome or What?” and “Even More Awesome!” So we felt the need to step up our game. We vowed not to eat everything they gave us so that we could actually eat the entrees when they arrived, but that was before we encountered the macaroni and cheese. Cheese madness ensued, rendering the previous logic unsound.

The couple next to us were really serious about note taking. There was a large wedding binder and a tote bag filled with papers and notes that were presumably typed from the yellow notepad the future-groom was scribbling everything down in.


I feel like they are those people that, when you go into the Container Store, they buy things and take them home and can utilize pretty boxes on modern shelves to create a lovely and organized space. Whereas I go to the Container Store and think “I'm gonna do it! I'm gonna be organized and productive!” and then I buy a bunch of boxes, but in reality I just have pink boxes sitting underneath of all of my other unorganized stuff.


After eating all the appetizers there ever were and an entree, we got a tour of the place. I had suspected earlier that we weren't really in this place and that we'd both been Incepted. After seeing this one room that I'm fairly sure was built by the dream-addled corners of my imagination, I was about 90% sure someone was going to need to kick a chair or something to wake us up out of it.

tasting5I didn't forget how to draw, my notes were all done via rough finger painting on my iPhone. The fiancé couldn't help because he was still in the thrall of cheese madness.

The best part was at the end when they brought out a plate filled with little glasses, and those glasses were filled with various dessert things. One was rice pudding, one was strawberry/rhubarb something or other, and the last thing was a cake, but it tasted exactly like a Thin Mint Girl Scout Cookie. It was amazing.


In conclusion, I didn't really need to take any notes, 'cause the place is pretty much everything we wanted. Wedding venue is go!

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Comments on An illustrated story of one offbeat bride’s venue search and encounter with Cheese Madness

  1. LOVE this post – it must be wonderful to find a place that is exactly what you want and have it turn out to be filled with yummy food! The illustrations are awesome. I want that Thin Mint Girl Scout cookie cake!
    ( I feel a little sad for the notey couple, but hope they found what they want too)

  2. Hilarious! The Serious Plan bride totally reminds me of my fave post evar from Hyperbole and a Half. She looks like she is going to go “clean all the things.”

    • THIS, so hard. I had this moment where I was looking at it and the thought that popped into my head was “taste ALL the things!”

    • Omg thank you! It was reminding me of SOMETHING and I couldn’t quite put my finger on it.

      (See that there trophy? I won it when I was 25 for acting like an actual adult.)

    • Damnit! I got curious after reading all these comments and went looking for the blog and post and now I’m addicted!


      Meanwhile I’m over here going “Clean… all the things?” or in wedding speak… “Look at… all the venues…?”

    • This is EXACTLY what I thought of, too! To the point I went and looked at the blog to be sure it wasn’t actually the same person…

    • i just love that hyperbole and a half was the first thing that went through my mind when reading this… and i wasn’t alone… thank you offbeat brides for making me feel right at home <3

      …and this is hilarious…

  3. You *reaaaaally* should consider writing/illustrating some children’s books… this was a treat!

    (wondering if it’s too late to call my baker and see if he can put together a “Girlscout thinmint cake” instead of lemon/raspberry)…

  4. Dear Christy,

    Your drawings are amazing. Please be my friend.

    That is all.


  5. Post is incorrectly titled.
    Please rename “Why you kinda want an iPad. And also a wedding venue with mini dessert AND macnchee.”

    But this post is awesome. Thanks for sharing!

    • I was just thinking this. Man this makes me want a iPad real bad…then I can take it to everything and recount my adventures via finger drawings.

    • I found the app for iphone! I used it to draw pictures of dicks on a photo of my sleeping fiance for 45 minutes this morning and then draw pictures to put on my blog! SO MUCH FUN AMG.

  6. hahaha, awesome. Yeah, when we found our venue we just knew. I guess part of it was that we had already looked at a bajillion places online and none of them would work, then we found a place that would work, at least in writing, and then we went to it, took a look around, looked at each other and nodded. No note taking required.

    I’m pretty good at The Container Store though.

  7. I love the emphasis on the beigeness of the bag. I’m not sure why exactly but it amuses me every time.

    Also double win for unicorns and cheese madness. 😀 I like how pleased the unicorn is with the two of you having a great time.

  8. Thank you!!! This was THE FIRST post I’ve truly related to. I have done next to no major planning. I don’t even have a wedding folder. I called in some favors, some performers I knew, and booked the venue that I regularly perform at…and voila! Everything was done in 4 days. My honey and I have basically just booked whatever has felt right. There’s been no drama, little to no work, and it’s all been super easy. But sometimes reading the wedding sites I feel like I’m “supposed” to have a binder and a BIG PLAN and be stressed to the max…when all we really want is to have fun! Hurrah for fun!!

  9. Oh I love your post!! We’re planning on mac n cheese at our reception too!!

    “We <3 cheese!"

  10. Yes! I was the complete anti-bride. A couple of my friends bought me a pretty wee book when I got engaged for planning and such … I think I used a page. To write the guest list.
    And I *love* Hyperbole and a Half. Brick Tag? Yes please! And Why I’ll Never Be an Adult… cleaning…no, Internet!

  11. The beige bag! The serious binder! The cheese madness!
    Oh man, that was good stuff. 🙂

  12. haha cool! I also came across one of those couples when visiting the venue. I was there with a big smile on my face, totally charmed, and the owner told me when they left that she was so stressed out and that she loved that I was giving her feedback, telling her what I liked and didn’t, ’cause the previous couple was so serious and just taking notes, she had no idea if they had liked the space or not!

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