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Lady Zombie is an executive recruiter by day and subculture performance artist by night, and her Brooklyn wedding was full of gorgeous purple details. We'll let her tell you the story…
“I have a pretty wild and eccentric life, with an unabashedly fun and eclectic group of people close to us. We wanted a wedding that expressed not only love, but our true, subculture lifestyle, and was also an incredible party that inspired people to be themselves. Our themes were a gothic fusion of royal purple and black, leather, fur, fangs, and bones. Our wedding party nailed it, of course, and it was incredible to see all of our guests, even our older relatives, really have fun with it, embracing our theme with zest!”
We selected reBar in Brooklyn as our venue. The package they offered included everything from our DJ, to floral arrangements, to the buffet and open bar. Their staff was incredible, too. They are a pretty offbeat establishment, so with didn't have to worry about seating charts or anything like that. We tried to embrace simplicity where possible, while still showcasing special details.
We wrote our own vows to each other which included words like fire, blood, brimstone, beast, predators, passion, and wasteland. Our maid of honor read a short poem from Daphne Rose Kingma:
For it is in loving, as well as in being loved, that we become most truly ourselves. No matter what we do, say, accomplish, or become, it is our capacity to love that ultimately defines us. In the end, nothing we do or say in this lifetime will matter as much as the way we have loved one another.
When our officiant Mado passed us our rings, he read the following:
These rings are a symbol of the unbroken, ever-expanding circle of love. Love freely given, has no beginning and no end, no giver and no receiver, for each is the giver, and each is the receiver. May these rings always remind you of the vows you have taken.
Before our pronouncement, Ina read “Entering the Vow” by Maureen Tolman Flannery: “What is a vow, but an intention spoken out before the world, so that the world in hearing might take part in aspirations of the willing heart. In our coming here today to join and bless the joy of your becoming wed. May we enter in the truth of the words you've said.” And Mado responded with, “Out of chaos, let us pledge our unity, never losing sight of the individuality that has spawned and enriched this love.”
Also, I will never forget all the effort our friends put into everything. My hair and crown/circlet was handmade by Mistress Sasha, one of my bridesmaids. Mistress LaMorta, our maid of honor, gifted us with the gorgeous “Love As Thou Will” shot glasses we used for favors. Venus and Scarlett, our flower girls, handmade the baskets with black PVC and glitter. There were so many little details that we could not have done on our own.
My funniest moment: I danced with my mother to Bon Jovi's “Thank You for Loving Me” because I knew it would make her cry. But I also wanted to make her laugh, so the song transitioned into “I Got It From My Mama” by Will.I.Am., and we tore up the dance floor!
What was the most important lesson you learned from your wedding? Disappointments happen. We were pretty lucky that things went as smoothly as they did, and part of that is because of who we chose to stand with us on that day. Our close knit group of friends and family really banded together to make everything go off without hiccups. We also selected our vendors carefully, read reviews, and reached out to people for personal feedback.
Your wedding should be something that makes the two of you happy. We celebrate our love all the time, so we just had to extend that to include our other loved ones in our wonderfully weird kind of way.
Care to share a few vendor/shopping links?
- Ceremony and reception photography: Milestone Images
- Vow scrolls: Artful Beginnings
- Bride's dress: Calla Corsets
- Officiants: Curiel Ceremonies
- Wedding boots: Harley-Davidson
- Card box: I Have Been Framed
- Bride's chainmail earrings: Inksplot Studios
- Bride's bone and amethyst necklace: Joanne Bedard
- Floral arrangements, catering, venue: reBar
- Cake topper: Sable Arts
- Cake: SlaytaniCakes
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This wedding looks like so much fun. I love the color scheme and how EVERYONE seems to be wearing the exact same shade of purple! And that last pic, in the rain, is intense.
And I always feel so creeperish saying this, but I swear I mean it in a nice complimentary way– the couple is HAWT.
I keep seeing little details I didn’t catch the first four times I drooled over the pics! Love the crying bridesmaid in the center pic (under “Biggest Challenge”) paragraph. And the cake topper. And that the officiant looks like what I imagine a distinguished older Rhaegar Targaryen would look like. And the lace parasol. And pretty much everything!
Thank you so much for your comments! When I found the fabric I planned to have my dress made from, I gave everyone a swatch and sent them off into the night to stay as close as possible. I was so pleased with how close their color choices really were! <3 You're not creeperish at all, lol.
I’m sure everyone here wishes they could be you for even five minutes. Gah, you guys, EVERYONE in your wedding looks so cool. 🙁
Aw, thank you! We had SUCH a great time.
SHUTUP. This is fucking beautiful. And epic. And beautiful. Did I say epic?
😀 Thank you, Sabrina!
Congrats again to the lovely couple! An incredibly unique celebration! I love that you used Entering the Vow. Such a lovely poem.
BLESSED BE!
Crafting our ceremony with meaningful passages wasn’t easy at all, but I think the ones we selected expressed our minds & hearts well.
This is so stunning! Every detail is absolutely gorgeous and so jam-packed with personality.
Thank you! We definitely wanted to showcase our personalities every way we could, and also to allow our wedding party to craft their own looks according to their unique styles. 🙂
Congratulations! Everything looks amazing, I love all the details. I am glad you both had such a fabulous day and I wish you the greatest happiness in your marriage.
Thank you so much, Lesley!
Just stopped in to objectify your officiant, Mado. ¡Muy guapo!
That’s what I get for assuming. I meant the best man, though I’m sure the officiant is fine, as well!
Father Vincent is definitely gorgeous. 😉
I know the couple…They are beautiful people with hearts of gold. I wish I could have been there to send my blessings to them, but alas I am too far away. Ali and lady Zombie….You looked magnificent and I wish the both of you all the best! Miss you guys tons!
-Mia (kitten)
Awww, hello Mia! Your well wishes mean so much, despite the distance. <3
Zombie! SO PRETTY!!! Those colors! Everybody looks fantastic. And that cake! <3
Kita, I can’t wait to see your wedding photos! <3
Oh my GOSH I suddenly want to be a man so I can do intricate facial hair designs!! I have never seen anything like that! That is so fucking cool.
YES! I feel that way! 😀 He did an awesome job, and I love that the designs were different on either side of his face.
I don’t have the words to express how utterly cool and awesomely fun your wedding looks. Wishing you many years of wild and eccentric happiness 🙂
Thank you, Clare! We will keep the party going as long as we can. <3
Everything about the dress/cake/mood/theme is just like decorgasm. Aughh.
Dat cake.
Happy future to you both!
Ah, decorgasm. Love that. 😀
Hey, there! I know we have written to each other on OBB several times throughout your planning stages, and I just have to say CONGRATULATIONS!! You two are beautiful and so obviously in love, plus all of your details are amazing. (BTW, I recognize several people in your wedding party and I know it’s your day, but I must say that Father Vincent looks like he’s from another world– in a good way!) I wish you both the best that life has to offer.
Hey Lisadee! Thank you so much! It was an incredible day. I can NOT believe three weeks have gone by already.
One of my girlfriends came up to me at the wedding and said (regarding Vincent), “Where did he park his horse? Hubba Hubba!” I cracked up. He’s always stunning!
Oh yay! My wedding twin! Congrats! Everything looks so beautiful. I’m so happy for you and your husband. I’m glad you had a great time.
Please link me to your wedding photos! <3
This is Just Breath taking! Every step is just more inviting and wonderful! This is by far the only wedding I can say is a Dream wedding! So Beautiful! 😀
Thank you so much! <3 It really was, for us.
Lady Zombie, I can only hope to have a wedding as divine and elegant as yours on day. As Gothik Secret put it, it was just breath taking. After reading this article, you and Ali give me hope for like individuals.
Hi Vash! Thank you so much for your kind words. <3
This is exactly why I adore and recommend this website!!!
I hate all the dating/wedding shows and magazines that shut people down for being beautifully outside the box. We hear “be yourself” but not if the world doesn’t get it?!?
Your wedding and love is magnificent. There is one thing I desperately wish from offbeat bride. Please include a story on how the couples met. I wish there was offbeat dating! LOL! But honestly there are so many times since my divorce I wish I knew I could find someone like me, but where? How other offbeats met would be so inspiring.
Blessings!
Thank you so much! Ali and I met in a tattoo shop in Harlem when I was a sophomore in high school. Our mutual friend took me to him to get my very first pair of custom fangs! I (clearly) have never gone to anyone else since. 🙂
That ring picture is one of the hottest things I’ve ever seen. Those nails! You had one majorly sexy wedding.
The way we found our wedding rings was pretty cool, too. We wandered through the city for the entire day, going into all kinds of jewelry stores and vintage shops… but nothing really spoke to us. Finally, the last place we wandered into… it was a warehouse style jewelry shop in Chinatown (different vendors selling their jewelry all over the place). Ali walked up to one case, and I walked up to another directly across from it. He said, “Look!” at the same time I said, “This one!” They were our exact sizes already… it was meant to me!
I love this bash so much. It’s amazing how the love can be felt just by reading the words. Little teary over here. Lol Much love from the universe to you both!
Thank you so much! I am happy to inspire that kind of reaction. <3