Kristin & Tracy’s crafty, fun, Eggstra special wedding

Remember the crazy awesome Egg bouquets from the Monday Montage a while back? Well, here's the full scoop on Kristin and Tracy's egg themed wedding. -Becca

The offbeat bride: Kristin, PhD student (and Tribe member)

Her offbeat partner: Tracy, Buyer

Location & date of wedding: Eggspectations, Ottawa Ontario — August 22, 2009

What made our wedding offbeat: The most offbeat aspect of our wedding was probably our venue. I turned to my wife one day and said, “Hey, you know that cool breakfast place downtown with the exposed brick, cement floors and winding staircase? We should call them and ask if they'll host our wedding.”

Choosing a non-wedding venue was awesome. Our venue was a breakfast restaurant that closed in the evenings anyway so, we got an amazing price. We had to do things like writing the contract and ordering table linens ourselves but it was definitely worth it! And the bonus part about making your own contract? You can write the terms to suit you!

Plus, since the restaurant was called Eggspectations were able to run with the egg theme. We made egg bouquets and boutonnieres and our favors were miniature cartons of egg shaped gum that thanked our guests for making our day eggstra special.

We also had five attendants on each side: four best women and one man of honor each. We asked them to wear black with either silver shoes or a silver tie. As a result we didn't need to run around finding a dress that pleased everyone and they were all able to dress in whatever way was comfortable to them and at whatever budget they could afford. Some wore dresses with heels, some wore suits, one wore an awesome bowtie and silver sequined converse shoes. They all looked amazing and, best of all, looked exactly like themselves.

Tell us about the ceremony: The best part of our ceremony was my mother's candle lighting. We wanted to take a moment to recognize our own privilege for living in a country where same-sex marriage is a federal right. My mom offered to light a candle and say a few words. There was not a dry eye in the house when she was done. Her words:

Four and a half years ago our Prime Minister, Paul Martin, stood only blocks away from where I stand today and spoke in support of the federal Civil Marriage Act. He stood in front of our parliament and asked his colleagues to extend the right to marry to all Canadians regardless of who they love. “This,” he said, “is an important day.”

Well today is an important day too. Today both of our families have grown and been strengthened to include a new member. Today, I have the honour of welcoming my new daughter into our family. Our daughter-IN-LAW, Tracy. And I am proud that Tracy and Kristin are able to marry with all of the legal rights and privileges that many of us take for granted. But as we welcome Tracy, we must also remember that this is not a universal right. Many people in this world are not able to legally marry the people they have chosen to share their lives with.

So, today I would like to light a candle in their honour. In the hopes that someday soon those laws will change and love, whatever form it takes, will be universally respected and celebrated. As I light this candle I invite all of you to join me in making this wish for equality.

Our biggest challenge: Finding something for my wife to wear! Finding a suit for a butch bride that is neither too girly nor too manly is no easy task! Until about one month before the wedding, we had absolutely no idea what she was going to wear. Finally one day we saw her perfect suit at Banana Republic. A wool suit, in the middle of summer, and in her size — it was kismet! And my gosh did she ever look handsome!

My favorite moment: One of my very favorite moments of the day was seeing my bride dressed in her gorgeous suit looking all wedding-y. Our ceremony was at six pm followed immediately by our reception so we needed to take pictures earlier in the day. We were not going to be able to see each other for the first time at the end of the aisle but we still wanted that “OMG you look so amazing today” moment. So, we got ready separately and our friends positioned us back to back in the hallway of the hotel. On the count of three we turned around. And there she was — complete perfection.

The speeches and slideshow put together by our attendants were also incredibly humbling and overwhelming. Our friends and families had such lovely things to say.

My funniest moment: My first dance with my wife was nothing short of my own personal heaven. And then she whispered in my ear, “At least you can't tell in pictures that we have no rhythm. But we are totally f-ed in the video.”

Was there anything you were sure was going to be a total disaster that unexpectedly turned out great? As we got close to the actual wedding day, I was pretty nervous about our venue. We were essentially guinea pigs and I started to doubt my decision to be the first wedding at a breakfast restaurant. But the owners and staff were fantastic. It was also a huge help that we hired a day-of-coordinator. Liane was nothing short of amazing and if there were any problems, I didn't hear about them!

My advice for offbeat brides: My best advice is to put as much of yourself into your wedding as you can. And by that I do not mean do everything yourself! I mean that you should think about who you and your partner are and have that reflected in the details of your wedding. My wife is incredibly creative and a lot of fun and that was shown throughout our wedding. She made Bride Bingo for the kids that got them up and intermingling with each other. For our fathers, she made cufflinks with pictures of us as little girls (these were a huge hit!) and for herself, she made cufflinks with a picture of her late mother.

I'm a historian by trade so for our centerpieces we collected wedding pictures from our guests own weddings. We put the pictures in photo-cubes on the tables with their names and wedding dates. It was interesting to see how weddings have changed through the decades and it was heartwarming to be surrounded by so many wonderful marriages.

What was the most important lesson you learned from your wedding? I learned that weddings are not just about the couple, they are about their families and friends as well. We ditched a lot of traditions that weren't important to us (there was no church, no cake, no flowers and no limo), but we kept ones that were important to the people in our lives. It was important for my dad to be able to walk me down the aisle (or staircase at the breakfast restaurant as the case may be). It wasn't a tradition I was particularly fond of but I was honored that it meant so much to him and gladly held his arm as we walked down the stairs to meet my beaming wife.

Care to share a few vendor/shopping links?

• Black titanium rings: Titanium Jewelry
• Videographer: C'est Bon Productions – you can see a clip of her work from our wedding here.
• DJ: Bobby T
• Day of Coordinator: Liane Reeves, In Any Events, 613-422-4165
• Dress: Sinders
• “Marriage is so gay” T-shirts and other paraphernalia: Pink Velvet Press
• Hair: The amazing hair artist Liz.

Enough talk — show me the wedding inspo!

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