Let’s talk about how my mother-in-law made me hella uncomfortable at our wedding, but in hindsight was actually a high-key genius and basically should get credit for coming up with the ultimate wedding gift trend: a bed.
First, you’ll need to understand our unique guest book situation. Instead of a traditional guest book, we had our wedding guests write cute marital advice on the back of their place cards. There were all sorts of randomized prompts, from “What’s a unique idea for date night?” to “What city should Anthony and Suki visit next?”
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One of these prompts was “What is essential for Suki and Anthony to keep in their house?”. We got all sorts of advice, like “an air fryer”, “a bottle of Scotch”, and even “love, respect, and fun” (aww!).
One card stands out to me to this day though. Not just because it was a surprising comment from my uber conservative Italian-Catholic mother-in-law, but because she had an excellent point.
At the time I definitely was like “WTF Pat? Our Ikea mattress works perfectly fine for sleeping and OTHER EVENTS!” But now, three years into our marriage, I finally see what she’d been trying to tell us all along. Pat was clearly operating in the year 3000 while I was a just mere plebe stuck in 2019.
That's why I think this needs to be a new wedding gift trend: everyone should have a BED on their wedding registry!
Here are some things that we can agree on:
- Good beds can be expensive
- Lots of us are using cash registries like Joy, Zola, or Honeyfund to register for big-ticket items that guests can contribute towards
- Wedding guests have a weird jokey curiosity about the sex life of newlyweds. Case in point: the horrific sexy games played at showers, and the awkward lingerie gifts from family members
You combine these three things, and what do you get? The idea to add a big fancy-ass bed to your wedding registry.
I'm kicking myself… I mean, I could have registered for a split-King with dual adjustable mattresses! I could have gone for a bed frame that had USB chargers built-in! I could have gone for a bed frame that was really quiet during sex!
…Instead, I'm still sleeping on an Ikea mattress.
People, don't make the same mistake I did: if you're wondering “what should I add to my wedding registry?” …add a nice mattress + bed bundle to your cash registry before it's too late! In a few years, you will thank me.
How to get in on this wedding gift trend: cash registry + group gifting
Ok, so logistically though, how would this even work? It's unlikely that any single guest is going to give you a luxe king size bed set, with, say, an adjustable split base, two mattresses, and the whole shebang.
That's where a cash registry comes in! Here's how to do it:
Add the massive luxe bedset of your dreams to your registry as a group gifting item.
As far as WHAT bed-set to register for?
- Offbeat Bride's publisher Ariel loves her Leesa, as she talks about in this post.
- An Offbeat Bride reader on Instagram recommended Zinus, reporting “We have a cooling gel memory foam Zinus and it's easily the best bed we've ever slept on. (And affordable!)”
- Personally, I'm obsessed with this one from Nectar Sleep. I MEAN COME ON!?!?!?
But wait, can we talk about how GROUP GIFTING even works?
The concept of “group gifting” with cash registries is a win-win for everyone. Group gifting means that the couple to choose can add whatever big ticket gifts they want to their registry. But since guests can contribute whatever amount they're comfortable with towards these group gifts, they can stay comfortably in their budget, contributing what they wish to the larger gift.
Want to know more about group gifting? Here's how Zola talks about group gifting:
Why Should I Use Group Gifting?
it makes your registry experience completely accessible to all budget levels. Plus, it's a Zola secret that making an expensive item a group gift actually increases your chances of receiving that gift. Guests are less likely to simple skip over it if they can't afford the entire thing.
What Counts As A Group Gift?
Anything you want! Really, anything. At Zola we offer an extremely wide range of registry items—from expensive bar ware to whole furniture pieces to experiences you'll remember forever. Usually group gifts are on the more expensive end but, with your Zola registry, you can make anything a group gift.
Do Guests Have To Go In On A Group Gift Together?
Nope! You can get that swanky bar cart from your coworker, great aunt, and friend from high school without any stress or coordination on their part (or yours, of course). We'll keep track of who contributed to what, though, so you can be sure to thank everyone when it's time.
How Do I Do It?
When you register at Zola, you can turn on the group gifting feature for any item on your registry. This includes big-ticket items for the home, cash funds, and even charity funds. Just select group gifting as you're adding the item to let your friends and family know the deal.
…Ok, so, who wants to dork out on which luxury bed you'd register for!?