Category Archive

traditions

Folks having offbeat weddings often wrestle with questions like, do I have to include wedding traditions? What if I don’t want my dad to walk me down the aisle? What if I don’t like the garter toss? What if I don’t want to do a cake cutting (or even have cake!?). This archive is our collection of posts about how to choose which wedding traditions to include, and which to skip.

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Lenna & Matt’s big fat traditional Armenian and Japanese wedding

The bride comes from a traditional Armenian background, so her offbeat spirit had a ton to contend with. But somehow these two managed to infuse their concert-going, comics-loving, board game-playing selves into a traditional Armenian Orthodox celebration. Add in the Japanese influences and you’ve got some multicultural mash-ups to rival all others.

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Am I still offbeat if I love white chair covers? (Hint: YES.)

Not long after I joined the Offbeat Bride Tribe, another member posted her feelings about the more traditional elements of her wedding. Ariel posted a reply stating that this issue comes up every year or so and she finds it’s best to let Tribe members figure it out for themselves.

Wise words, Ariel. I didn’t get it at the time, but the last six months have been a journey for me, a journey of discovery about myself, about my future husband and about the US we have created. If I could sum it up in one line, it would be:

I LIKE WHITE CHAIR COVERS AND I CANNOT LIE.

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Why do couples borrow cultural elements for their wedding, and how can you do so respectfully?

Many Anglo-Americans have such a mishmash of culture that they have few or no traditions that hold significant meaning for them. Perhaps people are inclined to like culture, symbolism, rituals, and traditions. Maybe they seek these out in other cultures because they don’t have any of their own. Perhaps people seek to set themselves apart from a family or culture that they don’t wish to be a part of or celebrate.

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Let’s re-write our notions about what defines a wedding!

The wedding ceremony and the following reception seem to be the last social events in our country to change even in the slightest. If you dare to ask what the big deal is about a white dress, people will ask you why you’d want to look like a harlot. If you suggest having canolis for dessert and skipping the cake-cutting ceremony, people will balk as if you’ve just asked your guests to eat their own toenails. You don’t want a bridal party either? Well apparently you have no friends and no respect for tradition. It’s clear that when you deviate from the preordained structure of a “classic” wedding, you’re a rebel, a renegade, an outlaw.