Why do couples borrow cultural elements for their wedding, and how can you do so respectfully?
Many Anglo-Americans have such a mishmash of culture that they have few or no traditions that hold significant meaning for them. Perhaps people are inclined to like culture, symbolism, rituals, and traditions. Maybe they seek these out in other cultures because they don’t have any of their own. Perhaps people seek to set themselves apart from a family or culture that they don’t wish to be a part of or celebrate.
Let’s re-write our notions about what defines a wedding!
The wedding ceremony and the following reception seem to be the last social events in our country to change even in the slightest. If you dare to ask what the big deal is about a white dress, people will ask you why you’d want to look like a harlot. If you suggest having canolis for dessert and skipping the cake-cutting ceremony, people will balk as if you’ve just asked your guests to eat their own toenails. You don’t want a bridal party either? Well apparently you have no friends and no respect for tradition. It’s clear that when you deviate from the preordained structure of a “classic” wedding, you’re a rebel, a renegade, an outlaw.
Problematic wedding themes: hobo, colonial, and more
Two weddings have been causing a stir on the internet lately: the Colonial African wedding (original post removed by photographers) and the Depression-Era Hobo wedding. They got me thinking about weddings, romance and romanticizing and I wanted to explore the issue here. This isn’t a post ragging on these two weddings but, rather, a chance to consider what got everyone’s knickers in a twist.
The in-between place: wedding planning and my Native American identity
“We are both proud of our heritage. My great-great-great-great-grxfandfather is Red Cloud, the last of the indian chiefs to surrender and be put onto a reservation. He did great things trying to protect his people and his way of life. However, sometimes we are not sure if that is who we are. Well… that is who we WERE, but is that who we ARE? This question has come up a lot in my wedding planning.”
How to have a sweet Valentine’s Day without chocolate
I have a shocking revelation: I don’t like chocolate. Perhaps this has led to my barf-reflex when it comes to the whole lovey-dovey Vakentine’s Day thang. So my husband do it up, Offbeat style.
Battle cry of the Offbeat Lite
Sometimes I get the feeling that my fellow Offbeat Lites feel out of the loop on Offbeat Wed. They let themselves feel pushed aside, and unrepresented. I’m here to tell you that’s not the case.