It took a camping trip to gain the perspective that saved our wedding
I hear it said that “everyone has pre-wedding jitters” — what ifs and cold feet. But I had a full-on panic. Like, “I woke up crying and told my fiancé that I wanted to cancel the wedding” kind of panic. I came home that same day to a living room full of camping supplies. My fiance said that he had to get me out of here. Too tired to fight it, I allowed myself to be scooped into a car packed with blankets and hot dogs, and driven two hours out into the wilderness. It saved our wedding.
How postponing my wedding saved my marriage
“It’s just one day,” I said to myself nervously. “It’s the marriage after that matters.”
I repeated that like a mantra while I continued with the plans for a day I didn’t want to have, not at that time or in that way. I had made promises, printed invitations, spent the money I was given for the “big day.”
Wouldn’t I be letting everyone down if I cancelled or postponed? I kept my mouth shut while guilt and nerves churned in my stomach.
How do I STOP planning the wedding?
Most of my wedding planning is done. There’s not much left really, except the minor things that will get wrapped up right before… but I feel like there is so much left to do and keep getting the urge to add more, and more! I try to remind myself that we are on a budget and what we got already is fine… but then why do I want to add, for instance, photos/or/drawings of us around the venue? I am stuck in bridal over-planning mode! How do I STOP organizing and planning and take a step back? Is this just feeling that will linger until the final days where I can actually SEE things come together?
5 step “WIC-whiplash” recovery: how to calm down when you feel pressured from all sides
Do you ever feel like you’re getting it from both sides: you’ve got pressure to be more traditional and materialistic on one side, and on the other side, you’ve got pressure to be uniquer, more special-er, authentically truly meaningfully YOU-er. Back! Forth! Back! Forth! I can resist tradition! I don’t want to avoid something just because it’s traditional! I like chair covers! But I can’t like chair covers! Everything we picked is personal! Now it feels like of embarrassing…like it’s over the top and “me me me”!
THIS, my friends, is what one reader coined as WIC-whiplash (WIC-lash?). Together, we’re going to take a deep breath and try to get over it.