Category Archive

last names

This is a perennial hot topic for our readers — is it un-feminist to change your last name after the wedding? Should you hyphenate? How is early is too early to start using your married name? And how the hell do you change your last name after the wedding?! (That one has an easy answer.)

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How to tell family you didn’t change your last name (…and how to cash those checks written to the wrong name)

“When I get married, I am not planning on changing my name. Our families are not forward-thinking and are bound to assume I will take my future husband’s last name…”

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Difference between Ms and Mrs: Am I a Mrs if I don’t change my last name?

I decided long ago that I’d keep my name if I got married. But … what IS my name? I’ve often used the “Ms.” title, and I expect to keep doing so. “Mrs.” can, however, be useful. I always assumed I’d use Mrs. MyName at those times, but during this last week I’ve realized that in my mind the Mrs. title is inextricably linked with the husband’s name. Mrs. doesn’t just signal that I’m married, it tells people the name of the person I’m married to. Mrs. MyName feels self-contradictory and weird, like I’m married to myself.

Maybe I just have a problem with the title “Mrs.” Do people use it when they keep their name?

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One groom’s perspective on taking his wife’s last name

So far the name change hasn’t cost me more than a few hours of paperwork, some explanations to public officials and a few strained conversations with brittle relatives who think I’ve joined a matrilineal cult. I still feel like myself. My identity remains intact. Marriage will demand larger sacrifices than this, I expect.

You might be an Offbeat Bride if...

You might be an Offbeat Bride if…

…you ask a bride-to-be what color her dress is and she says, “Like, do you mean ivory vs. white?” and you remember not everyone considers red/purple/rainbow/polka-dotted dresses for their wedding day.